What the f**k is that!?

So back to where it all began; Tuesday 8 December 2020. Normal day at work (or normal for covid-19 times) in that I work in the office at home, finish at 4pm and then chill for a bit before I head off to Sleaford for coaching.

I jumped in the shower with my only worry hanging over me being what on earth was I going to get Ellen for Christmas!? Well it was certainly naive of me to think that such a minor problem would be a cause of stress; but that’s what I’m like, I stress about everything and anything and buying the perfect gift was stressing me out.

So I’m in the shower; going about my cleaning duties and wham, that doesn’t feel right, what the hell is that. Despite being in a hot shower I instantly became warm and my stomach dropped.

It was hard, it was sensitive and just didn’t feel like what I’d normally expect. Now I’m not here saying I was a regular conscious checker, but there’s just that moment when you know, something isn’t right. I beat around the bush so I can raise it with Ellen, and being a hardy paramedic her response was get it checked at the GP if you’re worried, which being a sensitive soul, I didn’t appreciate the lack of concern but we soon got over that. I plucked up the courage and completed the online form with my local GP and then went off to coach, but it was all a blur as the worry and stress had already kicked in for me. And here begins the stress of being inside my own head.